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CALL IT WHATEVER, IT IS THE TASTE that Really MATTERS ; At the time, I had mixed feelings about my child being “labeled”. I knew that with a formal diagnosis of autism the doors of opportunity would magically open for Jack, and he would be supported both at school and socially, at least through early adulthood. I also knew that for some people in his life, a label served to “explain” Jack a little bit, and made it easier to understand him.
ReplyDeleteOn the flip side, labeling a child for life can be a harsh thing. Jack will forever carry a stamp on his forehead, or so I thought at the time, that will cause people to judge my child before he has a chance to show his true self. This reality shattered me and broke me to my very core. No parent wants their child to suffer, especially for something he can’t change.
I had no idea how we, he, would reconcile these two very different aspects of the one little word, autism.
What I, we, discovered, is a whole new world just waiting for us with open arms. People who helped us see the beauty in the chaos, the light in the sometimes profound darkness. Therapists, teachers, professionals, parent, people who have been walking the same path for a while, and those who have just begun. People who understood the strangeness that is our reality now, and don’t think it’s actually that strange. People who cheer things others take for granted. People who laugh with us at the absurdity of it all. We found community.
Launching my site definitely helped me. I started it with the intention of sharing my deliriously funny child with the world, and got so very much more in return. The inkling of an idea I had in the beginning was reinforced in spades: autism is a gift. For Jack, for me, for our family.
So, four and a half years on, we are at peace. Autism is still quite often a daily struggle, but it’s also an integral part of our family. There are so many experiences and people and perspectives we might never have been exposed to had autism never entered our lives. I have said it many times before, and I will say it again now: I will go to the ends of the earth to alleviate the things about autism that are painful, hard and stressful for Jack, but I will not wish for him to be “normal”. Jack is the person he is because of autism, and he is beautiful.
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